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thatsnotwatyourmomsaid:

WHY

THE ENTIRE SCHOOL WOULD HATE YOU

JINGLE JINGLE, MUTHERFUCKER.

It’s almost as bad as mum season.

What the fuck is a mum?

OH MY GOD. IS IT REALLY A TEXAS ONLY THING?!

For Homecoming, students make these THINGS from HELL that have excess amounts of ribbons and bells and they wear them all the time. They are usually placed on prize winning livestock, but somehow they made their way into schools. They have huge mums at the top, and they just get bigger and bigger each year. Sometimes they are completely covered in them. One day the students are just going to morph into one.

You knew when the season was coming because you could hear a horrifying jingle in the distance while you sleep.

They cost hundreds of dollars to make, or buy pre-made for the bigger ones. The bigger the better, and the more souls you sacrificed to get it.

What the fuck, Texas?

You don’t understand: homecoming is serious business here.

Also… is this REALLY a Texas only thing?

1. What the hell is your definition of a mum all I can see is these kids carrying their mothers around on their backs 24/7

2.  I thought Homecoming was like a big dance at the end of the year, like Prom?? Why is there livestock at homecoming??? I dont understand???????

Wow…I honestly thought this was a big thing really. My school in Texas had these too. They are huge mother fuckers and the worst part about it, you actually wanted to go to homecoming alone if you didnt feel like spending hella money. That’s because the social norm expects you to buy on of these for your date regardless of how much money you have.
Yeah, homecoming also consists (at least for my school) of a big football game where the blechers are filled with guys and gals wearing this fuckers and you would hear jiggling for miles. The cheering and shouting was nothing compared to the jiggle.
Oh….and after the game, then and only then, did you have an actualy dance and try not to step on the 100 dollar piece of shit you bought for your date. Because, for some dumb ass reason, girls had to have full body length mums and guys have shoulder length mums. It’s pretty damn stupid.

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